In the realm of Euphemismville, where rainbows and unicorns adorned the streets, a peculiar societal norm had taken root. Residents were vehemently opposed to labelling any wrongdoing as malevolent or evil. Instead, they indulged in the grand art of linguistic gymnastics, gracefully twisting and turning phrases to deflect, redefine, and recategorise even the most heinous acts as mere “minor misunderstandings.”
At the helm of this absurdity was the esteemed Dr. Pollyanna Wishful, a renowned expert in the field of “Positive Reframing.” Armed with her PhD in “Selective Semantics,” Dr. Wishful had devised an elaborate system that transformed the most deplorable behaviour into innocuous incidents.
For instance, theft was skilfully renamed “unauthorised property relocation,” vandalism became “creative redecoration,” and assault was simply a “spirited exchange of opinions.” Malicious intent was conveniently replaced with “motivation deficit” and greed transmuted into “resource optimisation.” A terrorist attack was now a “random act of enthusiastic fervour,” while a burglar was merely a “misguided entrepreneur.”
As Dr. Wishful’s teachings spread throughout the city, a remarkable transformation took place. Citizens became masters of doublespeak, uttering phrases that seemed innocuous on the surface but carried hidden meanings beneath. “He’s a bit of a challenge” became code for “unbearable psychopath,” and “She has a unique perspective” hinted at “completely delusional.”
The situation reached its peak when a group of demons arrived in Euphemismville, their glowing red eyes and forked tails causing quite a stir. However, the residents refused to acknowledge their malevolent nature. Instead, they labelled them as “Thermally Challenged Individuals with Ambiguous Tail Enhancements.”
Undeterred, the demons unleashed chaos upon the city, setting fires, cursing innocent bystanders, and spreading mayhem. But even then, the citizens remained steadfast in their refusal to utter the dreaded “e” word.
“They’re simply expressing their cultural heritage,” explained Alderman Sweetpea Blossom. “It’s important to be inclusive and avoid judgement.”
As the demonic hordes grew stronger, the city descended into a surreal nightmare. Yet, the residents clung desperately to their euphemisms, whispering about “logistical mishaps” and “temporary setbacks.”
In the end, it was the arrival of an honest and straightforward outsider who shattered Euphemismville’s fragile façade. With a booming voice, he declared, “These are not thermally challenged individuals, they are demons! They are evil and must be stopped!”
The citizens gasped, their minds reeling from the blatant use of such a forbidden term. But as the outsider’s words echoed through the streets, a flicker of realisation began to ignite in their hearts.
Slowly but surely, they emerged from their linguistic labyrinth, discarding the euphemisms that had blinded them. They labelled wrong as wrong and evil as evil. And as the demons were finally vanquished, Euphemismville underwent a profound transformation, becoming a place where truth was spoken without fear.
And so, the tale of Euphemismville serves as a cautionary reminder that while positive thinking and inclusivity are admirable, they should never come at the expense of confronting the darkness that lurks within our midst. For in acknowledging evil, we gain the power to stand against it and protect the innocent.


